I Didn't Know a Helicopter Was Involved...

Getting ready for bed last night, Molly starts talking... and I'm trying to comb the rats out of her hair and sort of, kind of multitasking while I'm listening... and then I hear "helicopter."

So, I start actually listening:

"So after they go to the ballpark and sing the National Anthem, then the helicopter comes in."

"Molly, what does the helicopter do?"

"Takes them to heaven."

*Insert perplexed Mommy look* "I'm sorry, sweetie. What's that again?"

"The people go to the ballpark and sing the National Anthem. And then the helicopter takes them to heaven."

"Why are the people going to heaven?"

"Because they're dead."

"And why are they going to the ballpark?"

"To sing the National Anthem. But does a helicopter really come? I don't know how that part works -- getting the people to heaven."

I'm still not sure what prompted this...

You Get What You Get... And You Still Got Upset

Luckily, Molly doesn't pitch too many fits. One of my favorite mommy lines is from Pinkalicious - "You get what you get and you don't get upset." Usually that works.

But not last night.

We varied from our routine and Rain Main went nuts.

Normally Daddy bounces Molly on her bed before bath. I played the role of bouncer last night since Daddy was finishing up something else. And I wasn't bouncing her high enough. So when I informed her it was time for bath, someone decided to throw an all-out tantrum.

So, I calmly informed her that bath needed to be done by 8:30 or there would be no story.

"But I NEEEEEEEEEED a story!!! " came the cry from the bedroom, followed by 10 minutes of, "I WAAAAANT a story. I NEEEEEED A STORY!!!!!"

So we quickly bathed her (much to her dismay) and put her in her pjs in between sobs. As I put her into bed, I pulled out my best mommy line yet:

"I really want to read you a story. But because you were throwing a fit, we've run out of time. I hope we can read a story tomorrow night. That's my favorite time of the day."

And after 10 minutes of sobbing (well, 10 minutes plus the previous 45 of fit-throwing), she fell asleep.

As far as ages go, two is easy, three is fun... and four is completely bi-polar.

Molly-isms

So, it seems that kids have a language all their own... and it's up to the parents to serve as linguists and figure out what the heck they are talking about. Then, we serve as interpreters so the rest of the world knows what the heck they are talking about. Perfect example, when a friend's son asked her to make hobo toast (which is quite delicious, by the way).

Here now are some recent Molly-isms:

- Coaches:
Example - "Mommy, I want to wear a shirt with coaches on the sleeves."
Translation - This one was fairly easy since Molly helped explain it. "You know, sleeves like Cinderella's coach." Ok, so short, poofy sleeves.

- Ballet Bows:
Example - (as I was tying her new tennis shoes, her first pair of tie shoes) "No, Mommy. I want you to tie them like Ballet Bows."
Translation - This one took awhile. I kept saying, "But these are bows." And each time the reply was, "No, BALLET bows." Luckily, Super Aunt Lois was in town and stepped in. "I can tie ballet bows." She simply double-tied them and voila -- Molly looked at me and said, "See, Mommy, THESE are ballet bows."

- Fluffed-Up Pony:
Example - "Mommy, can you make my pony fluffed up this morning for ballet?"
Translation - Make my pony tail as curly and fluffy as you can. Luckily, with Molly's hair, this is an extremely easy request.

Toddler Logic - There's No Fish in Fish Sticks

Scene: Outside on our deck, looking at our backyard and the flooded lake behind it (thanks to the freakish amount of rain we've gotten in the past three weeks)

Players: Molly and her Daddy, hanging out before dinner

Molly: "Daddy, why did the beaver dam up the lake?"

Daddy: "He dams up the lake so he can trap the fish -- then he can catch them and eat them."

Molly: "Ewwwww! I don't like fish."

Daddy: "Um, you had fish sticks for lunch at school today. And you ate all of them."

Molly: "I like fish sticks. I don't like fish. There's no fish in fish sticks."

And scene.